Hmm. It's alright.
Maybe that's part of the reasons why I'm refraining myself from logging in to Facebook so often!
I'm trying to let go. I'm trying to forget the past.
But I still wanna be his best friend. I still hunger for his attention. That's bad huh?
It's frustrating to have such an odd feeling towards him.
He's driving me nuts like, seriously!
My heart broke into a smaller pieces whenever he sweet talks other female, bear in mind it may or may not be his colleagues.
( Okay, in case some of you might misinterpret what I'm trying to convey here, I'm so not talking about J! )
We haven't been talking to each other for quite some time now. It's damn miserable cause mom always ask me about his news and stuff like that. awe...
What am I supposed to do? I couldn't differentiate the boundary no more. Am I just jealous? Infatuated? Or I still care and fancy over him?
I think the best way is to ignore him huh? And let him forget me gradually...That's actually what I'm most petrified of. Being forgotten by someone you loved so much before.
The distance, the age gap, the family background, the career...basically almost everything is tearing us apart.
He'll be married anytime because of his age. Let's hope that this day will never happened! I don't feel like disappointing my family yet I'm pretty sure we hardly stand a chance to be together again!
Someone would be real pissed of me, I couldn't help but felt terribly sorry for it. My apologies. But it's better to talk things over rather than hiding or concealing it. At least you know how I feel at the moment. It doesn't mean I don't love you, it's just that I still have another room reserved for him in my heart all this while. And I've just came to realized that.
What I needed the most now is your calming words. Let me know I'll always have your full and caring support. ♥
